So, I missed a day for my post because of a combination of Nathaniel's birthday and school stuff, sorry. My boy is so excited to be 5 years old though. He can't wait for school, and he wants to be home-schooled, which we are wanting to do as well. It seems like just yesterday we were at the hospital and I was holding him for the first time. :(... My boy actually got three days of birthday this year, so we were very busy, and he was in heaven of course. I was seeing many more triumphs during these days though, and it's so great.
I first must tell you what it was like for me to get ready to go anywhere before I started, in order for you to understand. I would have to prepare for my shower by stretching my back and making sure my hips were aligned. I would lay a certain way to get them to "pop" back into place and then I would have to recover from that. This took anywhere from 20 minutes to two hours sometimes, all due to the painful back spasms that would occur. I would then get in the shower and have to use long towels to get everywhere, this was a workout and I would struggle and run out of oxygen, so I would need to recover during and after the shower. Another 30 minutes to an hour there, and sometimes if my back was really bad I would need help from Janell. Then once I was able to get dressed I would need help with my shoes and socks, once again because of my back, hips, and my belly for this is a problem. After all this, if I over did any of it, I would have to stay in the car or ride a cart in the store to go anywhere. I was in hell.
Well, the last few days, I have not only had no problems getting ready, but I have not needed any help and I have been able to breathe without having to stop at all. Today, we went to Peter Piper Pizza for Nathaniel's final Birthday play-date. This place is a fun-house pizza place like Chucky Cheeses, and if you have been there you know just how crazy it gets in there. I kept up with the kids the whole time. I only sat down a couple of times. My back was fine and I only started to get a little pain in my hips toward the end. We must have been there 2 1/2 - 3 hrs. You know how they say you never know how much you miss something till it's gone, well this was certainly one of those things. I have seen the disappointment in my sons face when I can't play with him, and I never want to feel that low again.
I attribute this to my recent working out. I started a few days ago with the guilt workout that nearly killed me, but I have been able to keep going through yoga. I am determined to get my strength up to a point where that other workout is able to be accomplished. Now, about Yoga, OUCH! I mean wow, it is really impressive how painful that can be. Yes people, stretching comes with various settings; there is the AHH setting, the OOOHH setting, and the SOMEBODY SHOOT ME setting.
Now I know of the first two because I have felt them along time ago, in my younger years, when I was an athlete. Now I go straight to the final stage and dream of passing out to end the pain. Visions of unconsciousness dance in my head. I think the person who invented downward dog should be thrown into a kennel of hungry Kujo's while wearing a suit made out of raw steaks. I especially dislike the oh so positive tone of the workout instructor when they say, "mmm ooo doesn't that feel so good, such a good stretch....just breath into it," while you could mix paint on the shaking my ass is doing, and my loud wheezing is making the neighbors look outside for some lost wandering 90 year old asthmatic. UGH! But just as the pain gets almost unbearable, my muscles get really warm and start to release, my back pops, and my breathing regulates. I feel euphoric and energized by the time I am done. That doesn't mean I am not soar the next day though, another ugh there I'm afraid. I am noticing ease of movement already though, and I like it. I love the bonding that working out provides for my kids and I, and the other day Janell did Yoga too, I am so happy with the changes that are happening now.
11-28/29-10 Progress Report. Contorted and bruised, twisted and ringed, but happier than I have been in such a long time. I love you all, and hope your having as much fun with this blog as I am. As always I am so humbled and honored to have you along with me on this journey. James.
I didn't know if I was ever going to be able to start reading to Scott again after the mixing paint comment. He would NOT stop laughing LOL. Just so you know he has been following along by me reading to him and he is extremely proud. Btw everytime you do your pushups Scott is adding extra to his workout. He is really impressed with what you are accomplishing and wants to somehow show you support without having to type and such LOL.
ReplyDeleteI am proud of you too James, and absolutely loved this post. Very inspiring and full of good laughs. We love you!
Yoga? You're already doing yoga?? Wow, that's amazing. Now it's you motivating me to get going. Been thinking about yoga for a while. I have alot of mid/lower back pain from injuries that I keep re aggrivating. I know I need to start strength training on my back to improve it. Yep, ok, I'll start. Thanks James.
ReplyDeleteHey bro,
ReplyDeleteI know exactly where you are coming from man. I remember before I started my weight loss challenge I faced difficulties pretty much doing anything. I have always had to drive full size extended cab trucks so i could push the seat all the way back and then lean it back so my stomach would fit behind the steering wheel. I always had to have seat belt extenders and never could sit in a booth at a restaurant. There is a lot of things that skinny people are ungrateful for. Things like being able to sit in a lawn chair, being able to fit in a normal bath tub, own a sports car, or even just walk to the mailbox to check the mail.
I had a hard revelation though and that is what changed my life. I was about to to turn 30 and I started looking at the last 12 years of my life. I was just existing. I was not living. I would go to work and then come home and just hang out and eat and watch TV. The more depressed I got the more I ate. I realized if I didn't change now I would be saying the same thing at 40, 50, 60. That is if I live to be 50 or 60. Both of my parents died before they were 50 years old because of weight issues.
I hope that this was somewhat useful to you. You can read a lot about my journey and struggle at www.nomorebiggene.com
I have now lost 116 pounds and my goal is to lose 144 more. If you need anything on your journey let me know.
Gene
I know that i usually keep this short and sweet but I have something to say today so hope its not too long...The day that James and I got into the car wreck was such an impact on our lives that we are still feeling it at times...but the fact that he is on the road to recovery gives me hope.I know that not everyone that reads this will understand but we were on our way to get James something to wear to his Grandmothers funeral and we pulled into the road from our apartment parking lot and were hit by an oncomming car that neither of us saw...I was pregnant with our daughter Emily and the wreck was bad....very bad....We were rushed to the hospital where I was taken into surgery and then Emily was taken to the NICU...This was the beginning of what has happened to James... He is the one who was hit.. it was his side of the car... he was knocked out.. and his foot was pinned...It took three big firemen to get him out... So here's where the injury begins... I was treated but he was in such a panic to get to me that he was never taken care of the way he should have been. My mother came to the hospital and she and my brother brought him home and my brother took Nathaniel home... our son who was 2 and a half at the time. I was in the hospital for almost a week, and Emily for almost a month. I didn't realize how bad James was until I came home from the hospital...He was trying to be so strong for us. He couldn't hardly walk and was supposed to be on crutches... So things started to settle down and finally Emily was home and James was trying to go back to work... He was in so much pain... Now He was a big guy then but not as big as he got after this...He was limping around and tripped on a coloring book and fell and popped his hip and lower back leaving him in a worse state then before.. He tried to work after that but his back was spasming now.. He had to take a 6 month leave of absence from work... During this time things just seemed to get worse... He was getting less and less mobile every day and we were trying to go to the doctor and the chiropractor everything that the insurance would allow. I was wathching him become disabled...So last year I went back to work...I thought It would help for me to be working so he could concentrate on his health...We tried several diets.. we bought several programs...I think that the state our family was in became so apparent when I went to the housing office here in Albuquerque and the guy said we were way below the poverty level and we should be getting more assistance...It hurt his pride...we went to the store that day and he had to ride in the cart because the chair he sat in at the office made his back spasim...I know that this all seems like a bit much but... The things that were happening to James were also happening to me and my children.. I would leave for work and worry that if something happend to one of my babies would he be able to help them...could he move fast enough...He would make them play inside all day because he couldn't run after the two year old if she ran into the parking lot infront of our apartment... The injury he sustained and the weight that came because of the immobility was the culprit of a life not lived. I can't tell you how much relief I feel now that he is moving around so much more...My heart is lifted... I see my future in a much better light now... My partner is participating in our family again... He was able to take Emily yesterday and dress her after her bath... I know you think that it's not much but he hasn't been able to do that in over a year with out his back spasiming.. So I don't know if it is the yoga or pushups or the weight loss, but it is all making my life and my family better.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing that Janell. I knew you all were facing challenges from the car wreck, but I didn't know the extent. You are an amazing wife and mom, your strength and dedication has been confirmed time and time again. Through my support of James with his healthy lifestyle changes, I am also supporting you because I know that YOUR love and support is the foundation of James' success. Thank you for all that you do for my nephew, his children, and their mother. Love, Andrea
ReplyDeleteOK I am crying my eyes out. Janell THANK YOU so much for sharing this story. You know, I always felt there was more to the "aftermath" of that accident than you two had let on and that you weren't sharing it due to the situation. The strength and courage you two have shown is just astonishing. But from now on PLEASE let your family know the depth of these things. There isn't much I can do physically in cases such as this, but I will pray my heart out for you all. I have found in life that prayer is one of the most important parts of our daily routine. When Mom passed away the devil just started smacking the crud out of all of us. Mom prayed faithfully for us each every single day. I truly believe God protected us because of her faith and persistence. Anyway, that was my quick "please dont try to be so strong without our support."
ReplyDeleteI am absolutely overwhelmed with emotion for all of you right now. I truly never realized how tough it had gotten. Janell, thank you for stepping up and being such an amazing wife and mother. Your love and support is breathtaking. I have always known that you have a tremendous heart, because James would never have fallen for someone who didn't. However, I have never been given the opportunity to see so deep inside of you. I appreciate that you shared this so very much. You are a very beautiful person Janell, and the things you have faced head on are challenges that most of us would have given up on. Thank you for being you. For sharing your love and your support even when things got so overwhelming. Thank you for taking the reigns and trying to hold it all together. *sigh* I can't even begin to put words to how much I want to hug you right now.
As for trying to keep it short and sweet..... stop doing that! You are the wife of the man going through this! This means YOU are going through it too and your words reached into my soul, I hope that you share like this more often!
And I thank the Lord that changes are taking place! I was already so inspired by this post but now I am completely blown away by the progress and changes. You are all amazing and God is so good.
Love you all!
Man seriously I never get to read these without crying... What the heck homie! Anyway I love you and I want to remind you that you still are eventually going to walk me down the isle and Im thinking of making it a dancing wedding.... So im happy your getting in shape for selfish reasons muahahah joke long...
ReplyDeleteI just want you to know that you were my hero when I was growing up. You protected me against Ariana and Abe. You used to tackle me, taught me how to throw a football, how to block, how to trust.You taught me how to do one of my favorite things, sing. You always included me even if it was just to get a message later. You put a lisa frank sticker on your bass that I gave to you. You never took it off even when you got teased by members of your band. You let me jump on you, pretty much attack you, and you let me use you as a jungle gym.
Growing up with my big buddy was never about your weight for me. I used to not want you to lose the weight because it wouldn't be the same... but when I went to visit you guys in New Mexico i realized how life threatening it was. My hero, big buddy, my brother may never get to see his kids grow up, and may never get to walk me down the isle.
Today you are more then a hero to my childhood your a hero to your kids lives. Your taking on challenges that are far bigger then villians.Your like better then superman and spiderman! Just saying I love you brother! this was very refreshing to read and I am not trying to make you cry or make your heart heavy. I just want you to know how much you mean to me.
Love you
Leaky